Skip to main content

Letting go of the past only to look to a better future?

I know that people say this a lot, forgive and forget. The sins and mistakes of the past should be forgiven to allow the heart to move on but how true is that?
After all, our past defines us, how we act today is shaped by our previous triumphs. Not all of us have been through the rough times a lot of us have seen ugly and have had the ability to bounce back and keep going. On some level the experiences that we go through and I mean the truly traumatic ones scar us and affect the way we approach new things.

I want to open up about my past.
Yes, I am young in age but far more mature than my body. My mind is wise, and I believe that I have become mature based on past circumstances. I do not pride myself in things that I accomplish because I was not taught to praise but to be thankful to yourself, to show the world that you are content and comfortable on the outside no matter how you feel on the inside.

I didn't have a childhood, at least, not a happy one, my memory consist of an absent mother and a father who is the definition of a disgusting person. I was abused, at least completely physical. My mentality was scarred by the age of twelve. My mother who preferred the bottle emotionally was vacant from any relationship with her two daughters, before school, drunk, after school, drunk. The only sanity I had was a man who stepped up and saw the potential in my sister and me. It did not end for years.

The point is that after the endless mental beating that I was forced to endure throughout my childhood and teenage years, I changed the fear and pain into strength and I have given myself a bright future and will continue to not only for myself but my son.


There isn't always a light at the tunnel or someone to save you from the mess of the past, but as humans, we are programmed to be resilient, while a lot of us can access this strength there are those that give into the pain and they can't let go.

Some advice, Don't let go, remember what made you, you but forgive because it's true that "They know not what they do until it's too late"  I have forgiven my mother and have moved past the tough times, As should  all of you.


Thanks
Maddie .


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Whispers To You

Shh. Do you hear that? Make sure you are listening in close, I'm only going to repeat this once. I'm saying this hushed now because its a secret and I only want you to know. Do you know why? Because you are the person I hold close, the one that I want to share things with. I know you won't tell a soul because if you did, you would betray my trust and once its gone you cannot get it back.  Did you get it? Did you hear my message clearly. Please nod if you understand. I have a fear that what I say might scare you away. I only want to be honest with you. Know that my intentions are pure . I only mean to make you see,  to understand the voices in my head. The ones that scream at me, I know that you cannot physically hear them but I would like for you to know what they say. The dark things they tell me to do. The desperation in their voices when I fight back. Its consuming me.  Please don't turn away, like I'm a freak, I'm only human and I cannot help...