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Letting Go of you (Mom)

Take deep breaths" I can hear my mother say, as I struggle to tell her about my day. She pats my shoulder, smiles slightly and gives me the warmest hug. Sighing I release my grip and look at her. I take in every inch of her face, the way her gently flows down her shoulders. She looks young, but beautiful. I see a lot of myself in her.  She stands to leave and I watch her disappear. I look around and the objects around me start to change, mostly crumbled to ash.  I can hear my mothers voice, Its twisted, distorted. The softness that was there before has now turned into a harsh grumble. The couch that I'm sitting on starts to shake and the walls are ripped away. Only to expose a scene of dread.  My mother, sitting at the kitchen table, rolling cigarettes. You can smell the whiskey wafting through the room, the vacant look that now fills her eyes as she pounds her fingers into the roller, staring at me with hate.  "Momma?" I say, not taking my eyes from her...
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Brush the Dust off

Brush The Dust Off November 11, 2018 | M. Jackson Brush the dust off darling, the pain won't last long. Brush the dust off honey and smile, your beauty will mask the pain. Brush the dust off love, Pain is just a temporary burden, your strength is long lasting. Brush the dust off and stand up,and love yourself. Brush the dust off and walk along the path that was meant for you. Things may seem hard now but its only temporary, like the dust on your clothes, the darkness can be wiped away. You can start again and you can find the light. Too many times the fight is harder than you think and giving up seems easy but fighting gives life, changes and shapes you into a hardened creature with the world on her back. Its easier to give up but giving them a reason to stare is all worth while. We are meant to shine, not to be stifled by "I cannot" or " you cannot" when in reality you can and you will. You are meant...
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When I say , "I miss you"

When I say, "I Miss You" August 27, 2018 | MissTaylor When I say you I miss you, the words are empty. Sure that may sound heartless to most but to me the emptiness speaks of something that USED to be there. When I say I miss you, I miss the person you used to be, I miss the long talks, the laughs and the dumb things we'd do. When I say I miss you, I am grieving a loss, not a physical one but an emotion, and mental one. because the person I once loved so deeply has changed, I have lost you, I am abandoned. So when I say, I miss you. I am holding back, holding back from exploding with words of rage over how things have changed. How the bad outweighs the good to you and the person I once knew is gone. So when I say, I miss you be thankful that I am saying it at all. That the one shred of hope that I have left for you is hanging on because we walk a thin line together now, one that may tear us apart forever. When I say I mi...
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My Voice

The  wind is my voice and I am lost to it, floating effortlessly away.  I am alone, alone in the presence of many. A silent figure awaiting the promise of interacting.  The kind of interaction that gives my heart hope, hope that one day I will really be seen for the person that I am. The person with a story to tell and sadness in her eyes. The kind that longs for adventure and just a simple question from a stranger.  I have fear, fear that by the time I'm heard it'll be too late, that the wind that has picked up my voice will turn to ash (we all know there's no coming back from that) I feel that my loneliness will consume me that the ache inside my bones will get louder, pounding and pounding with the realization that I am unimportant. Unimportant to even those that claim I am the very opposite, Some say that I shine bright and have unwavering strength. I'd like to know where, because this shell I wear is cracking and it is waiting on the right moment to bre...
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